For 26 years now I’ve been helping singles find the solution to this dilemma through Drawing Down the Moon, which was the UK’s first personal dating agency.
Also, with my Smart Dating book, videos, coaching, seminars and my internet site –
Remember, too, that men and women often have different timetables for dealing with intense or painful matters.
What if your date starts to interrogate you about lots of personal details that you don’t feel ready to discuss?
Then, if you’re panting to get away, there’s no embarrassment because your date already knows that you won’t be staying long.
‘I promised to drop by and see my sister’ or ‘I’ve got to e-mail the copy to my paper by eleven’ should do the trick.
Be warned: you tackle such emotionally sensitive issues this early on at your peril! A good phrase to use if you want to see him again is “shall we give each other a ring in a week or two” – this gives you “permission” to ring him if he’s a bit tardy following through.
Whenever I hear that a couple’s first phone conversation lasted half the night (and this does happen), my heart sinks.
If you don’t fix the duration before you meet then it will be difficult to cut it short during the date, without seeming rude, if he proves to be of no interest.
Even if it’s going well, it’s still wise not to meet for long.
Talking about anything emotionally intimate, such as why you broke up with the ex, is fatal. If you are seeking bespoke personal dating – do visit or call 020 7224 1001 to see if we may be able to help you at Drawing Down the Moon Happy hunting and good luck!
Any un-addressed resentment or other unfinished business will be apparent to your date.